When it comes to lying in relationships, we all do it. A small lie here and there isn’t a huge deal but if you suspect your man of lying to you, you may be wondering why do men lie.
And that’s completely reasonable. You might know your man is lying about something but just can’t figure out why he’d lie about such a thing.
It’s like when they want to go out with the guys but use the excuse that they have to stay late at work. That’s not really something worth lying about, right?
So why do men lie?
It’s a little more complicated than just a straight answer. Here are some of the reasons men might lie and also the signs he’s pulling one over on you.
Why men lie
Be real. You lie too. Everyone lies. That being said, it’s super frustrating when our partners lie to us about stuff we know they shouldn’t.
So why do they do it?
1. He wants to avoid upsetting you
This is really the main reason guys are going to lie in relationships. They don’t want to rock the boat.
If they think the truth will upset you and cause a fight, they’ll lie. And really, is this such a bad thing?
So long as it’s about the little things and nothing major in your relationship, this type of lie is pretty harmless.
2. He’s unsure of what to say
Sometimes guys just have no idea how to handle a situation. They don’t know what to say but they know the truth might not be the best idea.
So they lie.
It’s not like he’s trying to cause problems with this. It’s more likely that he’s just caught in a situation he’s unfamiliar with and is just winging it.
3. He’s trying to hide something from you
This is what we all fear most. Guys who lie usually just want to hide something from you.
This can be as innocent as the price of that new video game he just bought to as severe as him cheating. The bottom line is that he’s lying so you don’t find something out that’ll get him in a lot of trouble.
4. He thinks you’ll be unreasonable about the truth
This has a lot to do with misunderstanding each other, really. He lies because he doesn’t agree with the reaction he’ll get if he tells you the truth.
So if he wants to go and hang out with the guys and thinks you’ll be irrationally upset about it, he’ll tell you something else.
It’s not that he wants to hide it from you, it’s just that there’s a disconnect and he doesn’t agree with your “rules” in that situation.
5. He’s trying to make you happy
Some guys will lie just to see you smile. You’ll see this most often if you ask him if he likes the clothes you’re wearing or if he likes your haircut.
The truth is that he probably couldn’t care less. But he wants to make you happy so he’ll say something he knows you like instead.
6. He wants to make himself look better
Really, he’s ashamed with himself and wants you to view him in a better light.
This usually happens in the dating phase the most.
He’ll say something so he can impress you and make you like him even though it’s a blatant and ridiculous lie.
6 signs your man is lying to you
Now that you know why they lie, you’ll have to figure out when he’s actually lying.
While some guys can be a lot better at it than others, there are always little giveaways that can help you catch him.
1. He won’t look you in the eye
This is the classic sign of a guy lying. He won’t really look you in the eyes because it’ll be too hard and he’ll feel guilty.
So if you ask a guy a question and he refuses to answer while looking at you, he could be lying.
2. The details are inconsistent
This will make it super obvious. Nothing will add up.
He’ll say one thing on a certain day and if you question him about it later, he’ll say something completely different.
Be aware of this and try to remember the details so you can catch him in the act next time.
3. Your gut is telling you something’s off
We have instincts for a reason. They’ve kept humans alive for a very long time.
The science of it is that your subconscious can sense when something is off before you’re consciously aware of it.
That creates a sensation in your body similar to fight-or-flight but less so.
That’s what we call the gut instinct.
If you feel like something is off, they very well could be.
4. He’s too vague
He’s not giving you enough information – especially compared to what he normally would.
If he’s being vague or even avoiding your questions, something is wrong.
He probably doesn’t have his story straight in his head yet.
5. He’s giving you too many details
On the flip side, sometimes guys who lie give way too much information. They formulate such a big story that they tell you all of it at once.
This is pretty obvious because it’ll be different than how he normally tells you stuff.
He’ll go into a big story-long explanation about something instead of leaving it at the simple facts.
6. He gets super defensive if you question him
Again, this is so obvious. If he’s getting defensive about something very small and simple, he’s probably lying.
It’s his way of deflecting your attention. He’ll try to make you feel bad for upsetting him so you can’t focus on the issue at hand.
He’s just trying to get you to seek his approval again instead of figure out what he’s lying about.
You may just have to face the fact that guys will lie in a relationship. So long as they’re harmless white lies, all will be well.
But if you’re suspicious and want to know what’s going on, catching him in the lie is crucial.
And if you’re having any difficulties in being sure that he’s being faithful to you, you might want to learn how you can keep him focused on you, permanently.
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