Getting married with someone you love is one of the many tough decisions you’ll make in life. And, as the wise saying goes, “Life is full of hard decisions. Make them.”
So whether exchanging “I do” with Mr. Right is happening sooner or later, know that preparation is key in starting off your union with a strong foundation.
Preparing For a Marriage: 7 Ways You Can Start While You’re Single
All of life’s major events require ample time and preparation for them to be successful. This includes tying the knot with your significant other.
And with that, I don’t only mean planning for your wedding, I also mean preparing for the spousal journey that you’ll venture on with your soon-to-be husband.
Since it’s a longtime commitment that you’re signing up for, it only makes sense to enter it when you’re prepared.
To help you with this, the following are the seven most effective ways you can start preparing for marriage while you’re still single.
1. Change your bad habits.
We all have patterns of behavior that are annoying and hurtful to our partners. There’s no better time to change these for the better than while you’re preparing for marriage.
Start by writing down all the habits which you know you have to say goodbye to if you want your marriage to be successful. Seek honest feedback from your family, closest friends, and colleagues if you want to hear what others have to say.
Visit your list before you start your day. Take a mental note of the bad habits you’re working on. Make a conscious effort to change them whenever you get the opportunity.
As the big day approaches, you’ll be surprised how far you’ve come with regards to transforming yourself into the kind of wife your future husband will be proud of.
2. Build a strong relationship with your future husband’s family and friends.
You’ve probably met most of them, if not all. You were able to pick up hints that made you realize you have found a good man (and you want to keep your man happy).
The next step is to create a relationship with them so you have a strong support system to rely on when marital problems knock on your door.
Also, remember that you’re not just marrying your husband, you’re marrying into the family. So it’s best to start building your relationship with the people closest to him now rather than later.
3. Lose the baggage.
You can’t carry all of your emotional and financial baggage into marriage and expect it to thrive.
So make peace with your painful past and come to terms with the fact that you can’t change it at all. Let go of the hurt. Learn to forgive those who’ve hurt you. Allow yourself the right to make mistakes and be forgiven.
The earlier you come to terms with your own brokenness, the sooner you’ll be whole and complete as an individual. This is vital in making your marriage strong, resilient, and divorce-proof.
4. Learn about marriage from various sources.
Most couples wait until they run into a major problem before they learn how they can work together for the marriage to work despite the challenges. Don’t be one of them.
While you’re single, invest your time into worthy activities like reading marriage help books.
You can also attend marriage classes in your community, if any, or online. Find inspiration from some marriage quotes every wife should know.
Most importantly, seek counsel from people who can guide you onto the right path. Talk to pastors, marriage counselors, and your parents about marriage.
This way, you’ll be familiar with the common struggles and pitfalls in marriages and how you can deal with them the right way.
5. Gather all the facts.
Before you exchange vows with your future husband, you may want to invite him for a heart-to-heart talk with you. Talk about everything you believe you should know about each other.
Since you’ll be one unit soon, it’s crucial to create opportunities for discussions about questions to ask before getting married. Discuss the difficult matters including but not limited to the following:
- Past (relationships, significant experiences that shaped who you are)
- Household Roles
- Expectations in our Marriage
- Separateness and Togetherness
- Love Language
- Pet Peeves
- Deepest Secrets
By initiating an honest and open conversation about these important topics, you’re leaving no stone unturned when you say “I do”.
You’re also saving each other from ugly surprises down the road.
6. Save up.
Most of us will not be debt-free when we tie the knot but having something to tap into in cases of emergency can make a huge difference when you’re living with your future husband under the same roof.
7. Learn skills every wife should know.
There are so many skills to learn so you can be the wife every husband could possibly dream of.
But since you can only learn so much while you’re single, here are the top five skills you should learn and master before the others:
Because the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach!
· Conflict Management
Because problems will stare at you in your marriage and you’ll probably have to sleep them off with your husband.
If you don’t know how to manage them well with him, your marriage will not survive.
· Time Management
Because 24 hours in a day is all you’ve got and learn how to spend these hours wisely with your husband can make or break your union.
Because sometimes, all your husband needs is for you to listen to understand, not to listen to respond.
· Dirty Talking
Having time to prepare for your marriage is a gift. Treasure it by following these seven effective ways to prepare for marriage.