Not all relationships are meant to last forever. But learning how to fix a broken relationship may save yours from falling apart for good.
It’s not going to be easy. Relationships are already hard work when they’re going well. Relationships that are on the brink of ending take a lot more finesse than you think.
But if this guy is someone you want to spend your life with, it’s well worth it.
Just remember there’s no “quick fix” when it comes to a broken relationship. You have to put in the work if you want your relationship to be happy and healthy again.
These are our best tips for fixing a broken relationship.
1. Identify the core issue
You might think the fact that you fight all the time is the core problem, but it’s not.
Think a bit deeper about why you fight all the time. Where do all the arguments start and what’s the underlying cause of them?
For a lot of relationships, it’s insecurity, but that might not always be the case.
Some couples have one with commitment phobia and others have one person who never communicates.
You really have to dig deep and look at your relationship from a distance. You can only work to fix your relationship if the core issue gets identified – and solved.
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2. Determine if you can fix it
You can’t always fix the core problem in your relationship.
For example, the fact that you don’t have the same morals and values is something that can break a relationship, and it’s just not fixable.
One person can’t completely change in order to “fix” the problem.
If it’s something as big as values and morals, it’s not fixable. But if it’s a lack of communication or insecurity problems, these are easier to fix.
Determine if your core issue is something you can both work to improve. Then the work to make it better can begin.
3. Communicate with each other
Now is the time to up your communication game. If your relationships is on the way out, you probably lack good communication to begin with.
Talk to each other. And I mean really talk to one another. Don’t yell or fight. Sit down and have a real discussion about the state of your relationship and how you can both go about solving the problem that’s tearing you apart.
Make your man aware of what upsets you and why. Explain your deepest feelings to him.
This might be hard but it’s worth saving your relationship.
4. Listen in order to understand
Too many people listen with the intent to respond and not to actually understand what their partners are trying to say.
You have to completely put responding or arguing out of your mind when you listen to him explain himself.
Don’t be the person to use what he says as ammunition. Instead, focus on using what he’s telling you as a lifeboat.
When you cling to his words and force yourself onboard, you can see his world with a different perspective. This will help you get to know him better and realize what your relationship really needs in order to be healthy again.
5. Admit your faults
Nobody’s perfect. And, chances are, if your relationship is broken, you played a part in some way.
This isn’t to say it’s all your fault, but when you take responsibility for your actions, it can really turn your perspective around. You start to better understand why your partner behaved the way he did.
Admit what you did wrong and apologize. Pledge to do better and you’ll find him doing the same.
Fixing a relationship is much easier when both sides admit what they did to mess it up in the first place.
6. Remember the good times together
After you’ve talked through what you both did wrong, bring up some happy memories.
When your relationship is about to break, it’s easy to forget all the great times you had together but remembering them is important.
It gives you something to look forward to. It gives you hope, in a way.
Hold on to that hope and it’ll make it easier to work toward a healthy relationship.
7. Forgive and forget past issues
The forget part is really important and if you can’t forget those issues, your relationship will never move on.
Obviously, you can’t change your brain and actually forget those problems, but you can avoid bringing them up in future arguments.
This is one of the worst things you can do for the health of your relationship. The more you bring up previous problems, the longer they linger.
Forgive and forget.
8. Build trust
A lot of trust can be lost when your relationship is at its breaking point.
You need to work on building that back up. In order to do this, you just have to communicate more. Check in with each other more often so there’s no question of the trust you have for each other.
9. Focus on the positive
A broken relationship is hard. It’s difficult to fix and it plunges both of you into the hardest and worst parts about your relationship.
You need some positivity to make it out of there alive.
Focus on what you’re still doing that’s good for your relationship. Make sure to put forth the extra effort to make your man smile while you’re dealing with these issues.
When you pay attention to the positive, the negative seems less significant.
10. Continue to work hard going forward
Many relationships end up on the brink of destruction only to get better for a brief period of time before it all goes to hell again.
Don’t let that be your relationship.
The reason this happens so often is simply because many think the work is done when stuff seems to get better.
But that’s not true at all. The work is never done. You both have to continuously work to make your relationship healthy.
That’s the only way any relationship can stand the test of time.
Learning how to fix a broken relationship is hard. You have to face your own faults and continuously work to improve your relationship.
These tips will help get your relationship on the right track but it’s up to you to keep it there.