Having sex for the first time with someone experienced can be very scary. You can already see countless scenarios in which you could embarrass yourself and everything goes wrong.
But here's a secret: if you like each other, there's not much that can go wrong.
Sex is something that comes naturally and you don't really need a magical recipe or a step-by-step tutorial to do it right. We all function differently, and no amount of experience can make you a sex expert who's perfect in bed.
Another important thing is that your lack of experience doesn't make you less attractive to your partner. Your innocence is incredibly sexy and it will fill him with confidence to show off his skills.
In other words, having sex for the first time with someone experienced has a lot of perks and you're in for a treat.
Although there is no strategy that always works, there are some tips that can help you ease the fear and make the most of this experience.
Easier said than done, I know. But I'm not here to tell you that you should wave a magic wand and suddenly stop being nervous. I'm saying you should make an actual effort to relax before and during the big night.
If working out relaxes you, do a work-out session before your date. Or, take a long bath and try to focus on positive thoughts and all the amazing things that will happen that night.
You can also orchestrate the date in a way that makes you comfortable: have a drink or two (but not too many), take a nice walk and slowly take things to the bedroom.
2. Be confident
One of the things men want most in bed is confidence. Confidence is the sexiest thing you can wear to the bedroom. Now is the time to forget about your little insecurities and just enjoy the moment.
If you radiate confidence, your experience won't matter much. The important thing is that you feel good in your body, open your mind and let yourself go.
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Confident girls are the best at sex, not because they can perform all kinds of magic tricks in the bedroom, but because they genuinely enjoy sex, and guys love to see that.
3. Go with the flow
When you're having sex for the first time with someone experienced, you probably want to come fully prepared. You want to cover all possible scenarios and have plenty of moves at hand to be able to control the situation.
Unfortunately, sex doesn't work that way. And, believe me, it took me some time to make peace with that reality.
The best sex is spontaneous. It's just two people going with the flow and doing what feels right in the moment. There's no checklist that always works.
4. Learn about your body
One type of homework you do need to do is learn about your body and discover what feels good for you. Nobody will help you learn that if you don't do it yourself.
In sex, it's important to know how to please your man and that comes with practice and experience. But it's also very important to know what pleases you. By learning how to please yourself will you be able to fully enjoy sex and help the guy find those right spots.
5. Explore kissing techniques
Kissing is such an important part of intimacy between two people and it's one of the key elements of sex as well. A kiss at the right moment can drive him crazy no matter how experienced he might be.
So, take advantage of kissing and never neglect it during sex.
Kissing is the best way to get him in the mood, to show him whether you want it slow and sensual or wild and passionate.
And I'm not talking only about kisses on the mouth – his neck, ears, chest, shoulders and stomach are all powerful erogenous zones.
6. Let him lead the way
If there's one piece of advice for having sex for the first time with someone experienced it's to let him lead the way.
Now, I'm not saying you should just lie there and let him do all the work, but learn to read his signals and let him dictate the course of action. He will gladly lead the way, especially if he knows you have less experience.
7. Keep it simple
Having sex with somebody more experienced than us can feel like an exam, a scary challenge we can pass only if we have some mindblowing tricks up our sleeve.
So, we tend to look for advice articles and sex position tutorials to help us prepare for the big event.
There's nothing wrong with doing your research (in fact, it's encouraged). But you don't need to put so much pressure on yourself. It's your first time, so it's ok to keep it simple and stick with the basics.
8. Get handsy
Your hands play a huge role in sex and you should make sure to keep them busy the whole time. You don't need any advanced moves here, just do what feels right.
Hug him, move your hands all over his body, run your fingers through his hair while you're kissing him. And of course, don't shy away from starting the fire by touching him down there. Just be gentle and listen to his feedback and you'll be fine.
9. Use your mouth
Just like your hands, your mouth is one of your most powerful weapons during sex. You can use it in more than one way.
We've already talked about kissing. But we can't forget two other key ingredients for good sex – dirty talk and blowjobs.
Using your words to verbalize how you feel is a great aphrodisiac if you're comfortable enough to do it. And when it comes to blowjobs, just follow this simple guide and you can't go wrong.
If you remember just two things from this article, it should be to relax and keep it simple. Everything else will come naturally.
Sex should be spontaneous and fun.
It doesn't really matter how much experience you have as long as you're enjoying the moment.