Am I ready to date?
Did I really get over a heartbreak?
The thought of getting back into the dating bandwagon can be scary especially if the last relationship was not such a fun experience.
You have had time to reflect and took a much-needed break (which is great).
However, there is that lingering question, “Can I do this again and do it right?”
Here is how you know for sure.
1. Your ex no longer occupies your mind
You no longer stalk him on social media to see his new catch.
At first, it felt as if you could not breathe, eat, or sleep without him.
Every waking moment was a painful reminder that shared moments were a thing of the past.
When you look back you shake your head wondering why it took you so long to move on (provided heartbreaks can be devastating and you deserve to take your time).
You are now realizing you were just ruminating on the good times and overlooking the cracks in the relationship.
Other things are occupying your mind now-your work, hobbies, friends and family (or whatever you have going on in your life).
2. You are doing fine being alone
In the beginning, it was tough to adjust to being by yourself after being a couple. It felt like ripping off your arm and now you had to relearn being a solo act.
If you like being single you are ready. It is not that you hate men; you just love your company.
The time spent alone has allowed more self-reflection and focus on working on yourself.
There is a growing awareness that you do not need someone to fulfill or make you happy but rather to compliment you.
You have not given up on love; you are just taking your time.
3. You are noticing other guys more
Whenever you are out and about, your internal radar keeps pinging when you see guys.
You notice that cute guy sitting at the next table. The compliments and eye contacts are not off-putting anymore.
There is no hiding your femininity and you love it.
However, you are also observant about any red flags. You are choosier about whom to give your number or interact with.
You cannot allow being easily taken in by a pretty face but the whole package.
4. You are putting yourself out there
Friends can now rely on you turning up to coffee dates or party invitations.
In the past, you just wanted to lock yourself in your room with a good book on Friday nights. The sight of happy and smiling couples made you cynical.
Dating can be stressful or terrifying, which is understandable — but it should also be fun and exciting.
It had never occurred to you, that you would start to miss the compliments or intimate smiles.
The excitement and giddiness about meeting someone new is a good sign.
Potential dates will easily catch on when you start showing up to events or parties, dressed the part with open body language.
5. You have accepted to go on a date
That is an indicator you are starting to dip into the waters of dating.
It seemed impossible at first to get over the ex because he did a number of you.
The past heartbreak had made you toughen up to any new feelings for other guys.
The thought of dressing up to go out with someone on your arm seemed far removed from reality.
Currently, more nights are filled with sparkly dresses, red wine, and laughter with your new man.
You love the feeling of getting to know each other, holding hands, and going on more dates. It is all about discovering one another.
What a great feeling to get back to it again (do not feel guilty but enjoy it!).
6. You see other guys as their on individual
The stage of “dating sucks” is a default for most people after breakups
Yes, past partners can betray your trust after giving the relationship your best. They might make dating seem so hopeless and you cannot risk it again.
If this was a measuring stick for every person out there, everybody would be single.
Individually, you know every other guy out there is not the same as your ex.
The habit of comparing every guy with your ex is an old one and you want to know them well.
Your mind entertains questions such as, “do we share the same values?” and “could he be a potential mate?”
This is the acceptance of other people’s differences and uniqueness.
7. You are not afraid to express what you want
It could be that your past relationship was marred with distrust and miscommunication.
It was a tough thing to share with your ex about nagging issues for fear of losing him.
Relationships are meant to bring people closer together and to share both hard and tough times.
It had started to feel like work and you were doing the most out of the two of you.
Now, you are not holding back about what you want.
The new expectations include honesty, openness, and trust. It is not about playing mind games or just flirting.
This is especially if you want something serious leading to marriage.
It is not that you are making the date seem like an interview, you just want a real human to human talk.
There is no shame about the past or wanting to be vulnerable.
Dating can be a risky endeavor but it opens ways to meet a better half.
It is commendable when you start availing yourself to new experiences. It means you have accepted past dating mistakes and are learning from them.
The above signs act as guides on whether you are ready. Everyone has a different journey to empowerment, so do not be too hard on you. As long as you take time to grow and heal from the past, have more faith in meeting a better person. It’s important to let go of someone you loved before putting yourself out there.
Generally, there is that gut feeling that you are ready. It is important to take time to weigh on it and see if you are well-armed to try again.